His pubic hair was longer than his dick
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
I feel like I should I write an apology note to the frat for falling down stairs, passing out on the couch, and chugging the entire bottle of burnetts at semiforml last weekend. Apparently I was the main topic of discussion at their chapter meeting last night.
u got into a flexing contest with a dude in bathroom in the mirror at the club
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
He texted me saying that his mom found my nuva ring in their jacuzzi filter. I don't think I'm welcome back anytime soon.
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
Spent fifteen minutes in the car thinking i was psychic before i realized the cd was not on shuffle
Haha no we did it on his bed. Then rolled off into the bean bag. It was a strangely athletic performance on my behalf.
So, I have realized that I am kryptonite for married men. I'm not sure how to feel about this sober, but drunk me accepts her destiny.
My lighter is stuck in my beard.
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
just made a presentation to 40 students and my professor about morals and ethical issues..still drunk. at 8am. I wish I could remember how it went.
How do I sound like a lady while communicating the fact that I want his dick in my mouth?
I walked in the kitchen and heard her saying "We could have been so good together" as she caressed an egg with her cheek.
Randomize
