Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
sometimes you just have to masturbate at your friend's house.
Have you ever seen an entire lecture hall fist pump? It's magical.
you were crying while pretty ricky was playing, what did you want me to do
she wouldn't stop crying, so we sang her to sleep. i'm guessing you will find her in the same position by the toilet in the morning. night.
There are topless girls riding the lawn flamingos. I win.
When I was in the bathroom and wiped with a paper towel I found in the trashcan, I realized that this might be the reason I have a yeast infection.
Somewhere in the night I send my Dad a text stating "YOU failed as a parent"
I really think that guy just walks around with tennis balls in his pocket. No dick is that big
Wait, you seriously DON'T keep vodka in your backpack??!??!?
He did leave his bud tall boy and 2 choco tacos, so not a total loss.
I asked him why he was eating an entire can of refried beans, the only answer I got was "revenge"
We turned on "find my friends" and watched her progress. Got concerned when she didn't move for an hour on Adelaide, turned out a booty call was made, then she went back to the bars.
All I can think about are the cheese it's on my desk at work this morning. Like are those apologetic cheese it's or does he seriously think he still has a shot..
I swear to fucking god if he takes away netflix I will have no problem sending his gf our sex videos
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