So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
I asked him how he was going to celebrate tomorrow and he said "tits, clits, and bong hits"
on toilet. in drag. drinking coffee vodka. I regret nothing.
Do you ever just look at me and get embarrassed?
The port-a-pottys are knocked over so I have nowhere to sleep.
I go to a class slightly intoxicated and they bring in a baby. What a life.
I may or may not have just ruined a marriage. But in my defense I got all my drinks for free tonight.
you owe me at least a beer for the services my girlfriend just provided for you
posting about faith hill is really not helping you get me into your bed
i was giving head the other day and thought of your all penis tastes the same quote and couldnt stop laughing
I'm going to take a nap so I don't feel like a stripper sneezed in my mouth tomorrow morning at work.
I went to BBQ fest on Wednesday and came home wearing a different shirt, so I think I did some good damage.
You can say goodbye to our security deposit.
Already? What he do?
Opened a bag of topsoil at the party and spread it all over the living room. TOPSOIL!
you face planting the wall was epic
did you at least save my tooth
You ruined the universe
Randomize
