I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
Now that I'm 21, I feel like I'm letting North Dakota down by not being drunk everyday
you don't seem to understand just how much pasta i spilled on my bed last night.
If her picture on my phone wasn't mostly of her breasts, I'd never pick up the phone when she calls.
He confessed to putting dry erase marker dots on my vibrator to keep track of when I "electronically cheated" and then passed out.
Pre warning. Your not gonna sleep tonight cuz I'm staying with your roommate. Thanks for breaking up with me.
I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled.
I thought he was being really sweet and protective when he pulled me away from the guy i was hooking up with, but turns out he just wanted me to get chicken nuggets with him...
I'll always remember 2012 as the year I hooked up with countless girls who had the sides of their heads shaved.
You made out with both twins? Ten points to you!
Oh you know, the usual. We had a good date, I took her back home, she took off my pants, laughed, and left.
Do you think they'll deliver pizza to my mouth
Not sure, she said after cussing out the dentist they called security. Make that the first person I know 86'ed by a dentist.
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
Randomize
