Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
Just woke up naked in my storage cubby and some one rearragned my whole room?
no jk, not my room
Just donated money to a kid for her softball team.
Obviously I'm trying to futher our next generation of lesbians. I may be hitting on her at the gay bar in ten years...
I'm going to kill the bastard that switches my hot hookups from the previous night with ugly chicks
Maybe we should try and tone it down a notch. The neighbors changed the name of their wifi network to "i can hear you having sex".
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
These margaritas aren't just going to regret themselves.
Ok, Jen and I are going out tonight and getting rowdy. I think you and Steph need to come. I understand if you can't, but not going out means you're automatically obligated to post bail. If necessary.
Really? Uh ohh sounds like a double date with extra stripper funnnn
I WILL BE THE BEST FICTITIONAL HISTORICAL FIGURE FOR THE FEMENIST MOVEMENT THE WORLD HAS EVER SEEN
Why were you not born a dude?
Because god wanted to level the playing field
that's the second time I've made out with him and woken up with my pants stuffed with PBRs I am convinced he's magic
My face feels like a midget just gave birth to quintuplets
Found my bra in the fridge. See you in 10 mins. It's gonna be a good fuckin day!
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