found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
Dude, this place has 10% alcohol beer on tap. It's like God's semen.
...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
Just ate lunch with a paperclip again. Seriously, need to invest in plastic forks.
my ass has officially been on the floor of every fraternity on this campus
and who said we didn't have goals?
I just found out my boyfriend is cheating on me, please tell me Carl is a unisex name.
You are writing your college essay comparing yourself to Lady Gaga, Vladimir Putin, and Dale Earnhardt Jr. and you are worried about the conclusion sounding cheesy?
I'm lying on the floor in the back room praying my boss doesn't come to work today.never again
Yeah I just don't know how I feel about my fuck buddy coming to work at my dads office with me.
So...guess who had sex tied to the ladder of a caboose under the stars in Joshua Tree? This bitch
OK BUT WHO THE FUCK FORGTS A LIVE CHICKEN IN MY HOUSE
It's just unfortunate that I still have the image of him having sex with me fresh in my mind
I told him you forbid me to sleep with him so he needs to accept that.
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
I might have to quit marching band. It's affecting my drinking schedule
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