what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
Dude, the girl i fucked last night left wearing my high school musical shirt you bought me. she also left her panties here though.
The one with Zac Efrons face on it? You definitely got the short in of the stick. i'd rather have the shirt
fuck. yeah me too. i don't even think these panties would fit me
if you ever come into my room screaming for me to set up rockband at 4:45 am ever again i will kill you
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
her sex was completely horrible but her weed was great. imma ask her out again
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
Streaking across a girls college rugby game is probably the best, and most painful, decision I've ever made
I really want to shower but i'm afraid i'll sober up. My mouth feels like a stripper pole too...
I just don't know the best way to tell him I think I saw him in a porn. I mean I got off to it, isn't there some level of awkwardness there?
Wait also totally unrelated but can horses sit down?
I just tried to picture one and I don't think they can cause I can't envision it
Look. When I let you cum on my tits don't fuck it all up by going "SKEET SKEET SKEET" it just pisses me off.
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
why is there a dog in my house with your initials shaved in it's fur?
dude, i just woke up in a house i've never seen. i have bigger problems
And on the way out from Applebee's he tried to take the basket of toothpicks claiming he was using them as a tax write off. Last time I babysit my dad on thirsty Thursday.
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
Randomize
