Got a toothbrush?
i have a new swear word: supercalifuckaliciousexpialadamnit
so they are in my phone as twin 1 and twin 2. but i forget which is which. did i put them in order of who I hooked up with first, or who is sexier? cause i'm not trying to text the one with the girlfriend
1st off, theyre identical. 2ndly, have i ever told you that youre a huge slut? hope that helps
We may or may not have a drunk cat on our hands.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
Go ahead. I tried to back up ur budhism story but she mite be catching on
Dammit. I hoped that would work. Just tell her I'm doing my pilgrmidge to Nepal or something.
4 am. She strained the mac and cheese onto her legs. She has no skin.
Dude this stripper just dry humped the settings off my phone. She earned that dollar
You are mentally unprepared to be exposed to my degree of perversion.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It feels like eating ice cream while riding a unicorn over a rainbow waterfall made of glitter.
That is possibly the gayest thing that was ever thought of by anyone anywhere.
A guy with the name Pootie Tang winked st me and a guy that doesn't speak English messaged me. These are my choices?
My passport was stamped in Canada two weeks ago. One step closer to uncovering wtf happened that night
I wish I may, I wish I might, get some daddy dick tonight
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
she referred to her cum as “pussy butter” so needless to say we had a good night
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