I need to just get drunk and eat a pot pie.
I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
Bein cut off at a bar is embarassing ...until you get to the next bar.
when we were having sex and i started crying and telling you i missed you..why couldnt you stop and tell me how you felt or make me feel better?you kept going...
We broke two of his toes while having sex. He laughed said he'd fix it in the morning and kept going. I think I'm in love
Yours weakened by children. Mine weakened by a forearm sized cock for 8 years.
Apparently getting dressed is an all-day activity.
Some guy just drank alcohol from me shoe..I think he's had enough..
Can you please come and collect your boss off of my kitchen floor.
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
I don't know. I'm drunk and dressed as a pirate but ill do the math tomorrow morning.
If you find me in the bathroom in a fetal position, licking frozen bacon .. I might have Drank a little too much.
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
I called to inform you I may or may not be getting laid tonight ...
She could hold her breath for a long time. Best underwater blowjob ever.
Randomize
