I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
Whats contracted in vegas does not stay in vegas....
just served this dwarf dude an entire pitcher of malt liquor. watching this will totally be worth my bartender's certification.
Hookup with hot guy from gym, check. Wake up to find he's peed in my closet, double check.
please tell me you didn't have sex with him in the bathroom...
Does an alley count?
If this herpes test comes back negative I'm asking out the doctor.
Fell asleep on the Grass at Lolla woke up in the Brown line. What. The. Fuck.
Boy did I ever crash and burn on the pickled egg pick up line.
KEG. KEG. THE OPERA HAS A KEG. KEG STAND IN A TUX. AFTER PARTY RAVE AND KEG STANDS.
Might be time to reevaluate my life. Banned from red roofs inns. Apparently I puked in ice machine. 3 hotels in a year.
Everything is just really out of control. I hear puking from three different parts of the house. Roger has black eye from being punched. Kaiser tried shaving his head, but somehow burned himself. Music is bumping, but everyone is either puking and calling out for help or blacked the fuck out.
My walk of shame was 2 miles of feathers flying off of me, underwear in hand, and a homeless man telling me he'd pray for me. It was gold medal worthy.
It was fine until they started lighting shots of everclear on fire and making ME take them. That's when shit went down...
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
Don't try to butter me sideways
That is without a doubt the most Southern thing you have ever said.
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