just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
Getting wasted on top of a casino. My penis is so much higher than everyone else's right now.
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
I wonder if her husband knows I have my own drawer at the apartment
The kid across the hall found me in the hallway using a hot pocket box as a pillow. I said its okay I live here.
I'm kinda amazed by how many times I've texted the word penis today.
i think he spiked my sandwich with a viagra
I had not one but two drunk coworkers text me and hit on me tonight. I feel like I've finally been accepted into my dysfunctional workplace
If you don't fuck me hard, rough, and senseless the minute we're alone in your room, I'm returning you to the boyfriend store
His condition for us having sex was that I wore my show boots. #equestrianproblems
I am attempting to break the habit of calling him daddy.
I'm that daughter that had to send her mother "DON'T GET SHITFACED" & yes, in ALL CAPS.
Maybe you should slow down tonight...
KINGS DON'T NEED ADVICE FROM LITTLE HORN-BILLS FOR A START
I'm so gassy and it's your fault.
Randomize
