he was actually really polite. he asked before he came on my chest because he "wasn't sure my stance on it".
Im watching someone hooking up in the library
procrastination at its finest
i hate always having to make my eye shadow look really good since my eyes always end up closed by the end of the night in pics
so jimmy johns showed up at our party last night. our house is sponsored now. living the dream.
in case you blackout.. this is confirmation that yes, you were sitting spread eagle on the kitchen floor chugging pickle juice out of the jar.
My mom is wine drunk and on painkillers. As invigorating as that conversation was, it was also a dark glimpse into my future
Who doesnt want to be Yoda? I mean seriously, how sweet would that be? Live to 400, not give a shit about love and all that, know fucking mind tricks and smoke awesome swamp weed. I'm down.
It was Thanksgiving sex. I was thankful for it. Need I say more?
One last thing: he lists glow sticks and tacos as things he can't live without. How would we not be friends??
If you're funny as hell and have a mustache, odds are I'm probably gonna fuck you
She has also never texted me first which I think might be a tell-tale sign she wants me to die alone.
She wanted me to stick my dick in the birthday cake she got me
DONT YOU DARE YELL AT ME. YOU'RE THE ONE WHO TRIED TO PAY FOR THE CAB WITH YOUR PANERA REWARDS CARD.
I HAD SEX WITH COLBY AND HIS FIVE YEAR PLAN IS TO STEAL A REALLY EXPENSIVE PAINTING AND ASKED ME IF ID BE INTO HELPING HIM AND I WOKE UP IN HIS BED TO A WOMANS TUBE TOP NEXT TO ME
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
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