I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
You know whats sad? As I walk past the campus daycare i cant help think, look at those drunk mistakes
There was a gorilla playing an accordion outside of my last final. I miss college already.
I think I have internal bruising from those poses we were doing last night. My own ribs hurt me. I don't understand.
He was having trouble staying hard then just stopped mid-sex and said "it's overheating" while pointing to his dick.
I'm at this kids house trying to figure out if I pissed in his kitchen new years eve. Lmao, stop letting me drink.
Road trip to buy me a baby zebra..are you in or are you in?
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
Wake up we need to beat the walk of shame rush hour
Everytime Our professor said "penis fencing" in class today we took shots.
Is "I am going to murder you if you keep sending me requests that I cannot fulfill" unprofesh?
Did you leave ur panties in the sink?
Kitchen or bathroom?
Well just give me the address, I'll bring the bourbon. If they let that into mental institutions
Haha idk you were stealing pizza dough at dominos
wait. i have to tell u something. and it has nothing to do with dildos or spiders
Randomize
