im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
Just made my alarm the Lion King song. Too excited about waking up to sleep.
Its official. Iv'e been kicked out of a bar in every state. I would like to take my job and travel time for allowing this to happen.
He's taking me to Burger King to celebrate losing my virginity..
I told you, I don't give a SHIT about their music. I JUST. WANT. TO FUCK. THE BASSIST.
Only you could walk of shame to a childrens pirate themed birthday party
I tolerate his mediocre drunk sex for the mind blowing morning sex. More than worth it.
I cried while dry heaving in the back of the car to the New York song with jay z in it. I was singing it inbetween gags.
Painting strippers breast and vaginas to look like easter eggs. What r u doing tonight.
Just witnessed some guy throw his fake eye at his dad's face. Actually, he whipped it at him.
Your final is gonna be as easy for you as getting into straight girls' pants is for me.
I am mentally ready for anal.
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
Get your heels and tits on! I’m not wasting a Brazilian because his fucking kid ate paste or Legos and ruined an afternoon suite sex and room service
Randomize