Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
vicodin is the reason why I believe in magic
he kept refering to his penis as the "eternal sunshine"
Get caught with marijuana. Cop takes piece. Buy new bong. Circle of fun.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well I let her practice her tattooing on me. This shaky dragon on my arm says Im getting laid.
The last time I thought I had a UTI, I ended up having herpes. Sooo.. This time in preparing myself for cancer or death.
Where the fuck do you get consience sedatives from?
Hey! I need booze. And penises. And a lot of mistakes that I will regret in the morning.
I'm sorry about all of the innappropriate shoe throwing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
WE'RE NOT MAKING A DICK PIZZA OKAY
Dude she's from Moscow. I feel like I'm cheating on America.
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
Lynn just told me "I heard about your divorce. Condoms or morning pill your choice and I'm buying". Sorry but I got plans now bro.
Not this time. I'm drinking in my sweatpants which means I've given up for the day and shouldn't be in public.
I know I'm drunk but why am I receiving this handjob through the pant leg of my shorts..?
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