yeah seriously, fuck school. I'm changing my master's thesis question from "what are the neuropsychological correlates of antisocial personality" to "will my cat drink this beer"
The guy drove to our house at 6am to sell us weed. Now that's customer service.
reaaaally cool. my cat ate my birth control.
I need the number of a restaurant that delivers, has lock-picking abilities, and is okay with full frontal male nudity. Entirely too hungover to get out of bed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So we reenacted men's olympic skeet shooting using roman candles and flattened beer cans. That's all
He saved you from those guys at the club, took you home, and made you breakfast. If this isn't your come to Jesus moment IDK what is.
He got too drunk... he threw up ON the closed toilet.
It's a Jersey thing
Watching Faye Reagan porn all weekend for St Patty's day. Nothing has ever seemed more appropriate.
All I found in my purse this morning was 160 cigarettes and a fistful of confetti.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No other awkward car ride can beat the one you give your drug dealer home.
So far I consider it a great summer because I have had to buy Plan B a total of zero times
I just got CPR certified, don't make me need these skills so soon
Currently doing the walk of shame out of some random girls house with my boyfriend. Talk about relationship goals.
I woke up, topless, my car was parked funny so I threw on my hoodieto go fix it and found a jello shot in my pocket. where did I go last night?!
What's an appropriate gift to bring to my boyfriend's wife's baby shower?
Shame?
Randomize