i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
You even been so high breaking up weed with your fingers feels like surgery?
he left me a note this morning. it said "thank you for letting me touch you"
i woke up in his bed to a "teach your baby to read" infomercial. i pray to GOD that's not a sign
if u cant get laid at this wedding we need to have a looooooong talk about the possibility of u becoming a lesbian
I searched the house and found a small bottle of sherry which is probably as old as I am, has prob gone off and tastes like shit. I don't care any more. It has come to this.
Mass texted booty calls to all the guys I've hooked up with this year to commemorate the end of the semester.
While eating post sex burritos I dripped taco bell sauce on my boob. He licked it off and asked why I hadn't thought of that before.
Bro... You handed me an ice cube from your drink and said "tell me if it tastes like pickles".
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
idk i was trying to watch Fuller House and you got up out of a dead sleep, just in your boxers, said "no more Dave Coulier" and walked out to the living room and unplugged the router
Such a shame we didn't work out. We would've been a power couple producing NFL linemen :/
I'm the one who said we should take things slow. I'm also the one who forced him into the back on my car so we could have sex.
I just want to get high and watch Dr. Pimple Popper.
Randomize
