Hard to imagine a reason apart from blow jobs that I'm awake at 530 am.
Haha he acted like he's never seen a tampon catapolt across the hall before
shes a baton twirler.. i expected her to be better with her hands.
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
$1 margaritas. This happy hour needs to end.
i feel like the 7 eleven by your house knows our deepest, darkest secrets
Either I just got hit on by a 10 year old.girl dressed like a boy or I just got hit on by a midget lesbian. Either way I feel uncomfortable
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
if the furniture in my bedroom wasn't shape shifting... this would be a different story.
Oh, and one of the worst parts... his name was Mario. I fucked a Nintendo character.
I can still taste the Jäger. I'm gonna shoot myself.
I'm not sure when I will get off this toilet at work but it's not looking promising
We were like one big happy Eskimo family.
He put a doughnut around his dick and I ate it. What can I say. It was a good fucking night.
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
Randomize
