Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
Never forget that any girl can get her way if she puts her vagina on the table.
At least you're going to bed with all the teeth you woke up with
I asked her if she wanted to make this a permanent exclusive thing instead of a fuck buddy thing, and she just looked at me like I'm an idiot.
That's because you are an idiot.
So I saw the nuva ring just lying on the counter at Planned Parenthood...did u know it's just a ring? I could go to the Dollar tree buy a plastic bracelet and shove it up there instead.
You do that. Then go have lots of unprotected with your harem of booty calls and see how that works out for you.
im sure shes a lovely person but i cant be friends with someone that doesnt drink. its just not right.
I have the slightest memory of swinging a bag full of condoms over my head...
I JUST FOUND AN INTERNATIONAL POLE DANCING CHAMPIONSHIP IN SPANISH
If you can find a Canadian Lesbian to have pity sex with me, let me know.
However today I got my lube that might I add was dripping out of the box. I'd like to think my mailman was mixing business with pleasure.
I would rather you cheat on me then you watch this season of Breaking Bad without me.
Dougie got over his pride nerves. Found him dancing on a float wearing nothing but rainbow boxers.
That was the night I realized I need to grow up and stop eating mushrooms with strange 40 year old men in convertibles.
I learned so much in Pittsburgh
This will never work. His dick is smaller than mine.
Wow. And yours is kind of small.
RIGHT?
But the real reason your aunt is drunk crying is because she has already had four margs and went for a 5th and someone is trying to stop her
Randomize
