my orientation roommate looks just like New York of Flavor Flav fame
Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
So many people have lost their virginity on my futon... I think it is only the right thing to bronze it and put it on display
Of course... Double fistin nati light cuz the powers out and it cuts down the times i gotta open the fridge... Genius
Standards? I'm sitting on his couch eating microwaved ramen wearing his wife's t-shirt. I don't remember what having standards even feels like.
She ditched her BF in the library to come see me wasted at a house party and i still ended up banging that rugby chick instead.
thats because you have standards... and i have a thing for guys that give me free drugs.
We are sitting here staring into each others eyes, mutually rubbing forks up and down our respective noses. High as balls doesn't even begin to cover it.
Would it be weird if your parents sold me weed?
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
Can you come unlock the door? I just peed myself on the porch.
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
I'm going to make a stack of pancakes and fuck it. Right now.
Randomize
