trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
you're by far the better bro. your dick is more impressively sized, anyway
I hate that you know that from experience
I wish you would just come have sex with me in ihop. I don't want to be here
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They sent me to the hospital. Apparently, of the many things I said, I looked at the doctor and told him, "Wow... it's like you're a REAL DOCTOR!"
Why do i feel like Captain Hook just gave me a pap smear?
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
I woke up wearing my panties and an eyelash, soo I'd say your birthday was a success.
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He has a bathrroom scale in his room with an alarm attached to it so anything over 150 sets it off and in his drinking stupper he can make a run for it.
The fact I have to evaluate my choice between tequila and fruity pebbles is a clear image of my life right now
There's a set of buzz lightyear wings in lost and found at work. I just need access to your roof.
He told me that he had never gotten a blow job. I sat there for a second, then thought "I MUST FIX THIS!" It was fucking fantastic.
location: under the moon. please find me. need ride home.
we should get together and get drunk.
On a Monday?
don't discriminate against mondays.
Randomize