i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
I glued a penny on the door Tricia believes its Patrick Swayze haunting our apartment. Fuckin potheads.
anyone who buys me chipotle gets an automatic hj
There was a pool of blood on my desk and we still don't know who it belongs to. missed a good party, man.
I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
I hate how you keep a running list of people who have seen me naked.
his dad told me thanks for making his little boy a man at breakfast this morning
It's a good thing i didn't end up pregnant...i would have had to figure out his last name.
I cant leave dude. theres a horse with a top hat on
Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
She slapped his drink out of his hand to get him to leave the bar while he and I were having an intense debate about the lyrics to mmmbop
Thanks for gettin' me home, killa. Have no IDEA how I woke up pants-less on the bathroom floor at 4a.m. You're like a big, angry guardian angel.
So when I eventually, if ever, find someone I'd like to marry, do you think having people fly to africa for a lion king themed wedding is too much?
you got to sleep with him and don't even remember it? that's like sleeping through an entire vacation
That's a lot of judgement coming from a man wearing a dress made from a bedsheet.
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