He finally told me that he's married. I guess it doesn't really matter.
I think I have swimmer's ear. From his tongue.
My vagina is so ashamed right now. It won't even look at me.
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm sad your dog died... Her name is my stripper name.
then he compared my vagina to a dishwasher. A DISHWASHER?!
I found your bra. How you get it off the satellite dish is your problem.
You need a Jiminy Cricket, but for sexual decisions.
She said I was the most selfish person in bed she's ever been with and she's fucked Tucker Max.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Was last night real? Did I lick your forehead while you laid in between my legs while we laid next to your boyfriend?
He should be castrated
Nah he might accidentally come while they're cutting it off. Wouldn't be fair to the surgeons
I passed out in all my clothes. like my purse too..and with a cup of water next to me..and my last tweet last night was "Bye."
No joke, I just found $85 on the ground. Must be because I bought you all that liquor. So much good karma.
It finally happened my mom knowingly gave me money to buy drugs i knew this day would come\n
I texted him back and I am so nervous I may vomit up all of the soup I just ate.
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