I bet they all look and smell like Amy Winehouse
my drunken desire to be gossip girl continues to ruin friendships for me
I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
bark. im thoroughly looking forward to kegs and eggs. next weekend should be pancakes and pinnical, then cereal and seagrams and then whiskey and waffles.
Is it possible to dent your eyeball? And how do you "accidentally" go cosmic bowling?
The cab driver just showed us a POV shot of himself getting ridden by a chick he took with his flip phone. Confirmed not taken in cab. Gonna be a good night...
I was galloping around pretending to give birth to pbrs. I could have used a mask.
How's my date look?
Like a retarded elf
In a good way
you guys just sat there and simultaneously smoked bowls staring at each other... it was like a bowl off or something.
I got so stoned last night I thought I was in second grade again
I've spent all afternoon taking and editing selfies. The life of a bimbo is truly tiring.
I really shouldn't have to tell you to stop banging your lightsaber on everything while we are in college.
I would totes reciprocate the nip pic, but I'm sick with a piece of tissue shoved up one of my nostrils and I'm just not feeling that ambitious. Sorry.
The chances of me making out with someone next weekend are about the same as me not remembering it.
I woke up in the middle of the night with my dick out and my electric blanket on high. It's like she wanted a hot dog.
Randomize
