Last night while we were having sex, 'God bless the USA' started playing on his itunes. He came almost immediately... so awkward.
yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
Whoa! I think of you when I eat cottage cheese.
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
Were taking tot shots. If toddlers could drink these are the size of shots they would take
I kept reassuring him that I was easy like Sunday morning, not easy like "I've had 6 shots of tequila and haven't had sex in three months"
How soon is too soon to enter the slutty phase of this breakup?
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
last night on the strip the guy screamed at you YOU GOTTA WORK ON YOUR CALVES.
He just stays over and makes naked pancakes in the morning
I just used Bacardi to dry out poison ivy.
I was just thinking about all the dick I could catch while I am home. But then I realized I am too lazy to get out of my pjs and leave my cat.
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
Remember when we thought adulthood would be different than college?
It is different. We had hopes and dreams back then. Now we're just alcoholics.
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
Randomize
