guy from last night has fluorescent crocs in his closet. judging by the rest of his clothes he doesn't wear them in an ironic way
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
I'm making celebratory pizza rolls. They're a lot like regular pizza rolls, but without the taste of shame.
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
I NEVER left your party last night of anyone asks.
Yeah, I didn't wake up handcuffed to my bed either.
My liver was like a college freshman on spring break. It would've danced topless on tables if it could have.
I don't know if I want to live in a world where i can't fuck an exes brother.
And now we should drink to that moment where you realize you didn't exactly think things through.
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
He had really great hair, but he told me he's been in a psych ward three times. I mean I know I'm a psych major, but that's too much.
People are talking politics and I have had 9 mimosas
It's has to do with my genitals. Don't ask.
I came so hard my entire leg seized. Her blowjob gave me a Charlie horse.
My breath smells like dick and biscuits..
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