I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
I'm watching this guy on intervention hospitalized for liver damage. He's drinking the hand sanitizer in the hospital room. Say hello to your future.
she was sobbing drunk in the backseat about her dead cat and how the guy in the front seat didn't want to hook up with her
In case you were unaware playing with rabbits on ecstasy is the greatest thing ever. I feel like I'm ODing on adorable right now.
After you verbally abused the McDonalds employee for not making your fries fast enough, the fact that you woke up on a random lawn does not surprise me.
I know. He gave me a hug and i was like jesus i can just feel the std through your sweatshirt
This is what we get for YOLOing our way to obesity
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
If I had your ass I would rule the world
ATTENTION: just found out of have strep. if we have had sex in the past week, might wanna go to the doctor. if you plan to have sex with me in the next 20 days go buy some condoms. stupid antibiotics.
That was the first time i’ve been physically intimidated by a LinkedIn profile.
We ran out of vodka, so instead of body shots you wanted to do cupcake shots off her naked body...happy birthday to you.
he said he only had one rule...that he'd only go down on me 3x a day. so far this is turning into the best relationship ever.
FINE I guess I'll just drink regular coke like a PLEBIAN.
I'm so gassy and it's your fault.
Randomize
