well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
I just set a weed brownie on fire in the microwave.
Successful day.
you told him to eat candy out of your ear instead of your vagina because you had your period. never. drink. AGAIN.
No period for spring break; use this wisely.
I just saw a guy in the gym riding the bicycle while watching baseball and dipping.
Vaginas are confusing as hell with all their secret compartments and shit.
I'll get my vaginal cartography poster.
Just watched a guy puke off his bike. Beyond impressed. He didn't even swerve
Is it uncouth to have a themed intervention? I know how much you like Star Wars.
My dad is so drunk he attempted to ride my two year old cousin's tricycle. For a solid five minutes.
she got the mcdonald's logo tattooed on her ass. sober. yesterday at noon.
btw im having a "its finally warm enough for a bbq in Toronto" party tonight. bring all the alcohol you have. and hamburger buns.
Homophobes nationwide are huddled in their bunkers tonight and I can't stop giggling. Could be the wine.
That's the 3rd guy I've made pass out from a bj. I may have super powers.
One of these days I would like to go out drinking and stick to plan of just getting drunk and not be sidetracked with other people's plans of doing drugs along the way. I didn't even want to not feel my teeth tonight but here we go just another Thursday night when you live I live
I feel like I purchased a one way ticket to hell last night and its non refundable.
Randomize
