My eyes are so dilated i literally have night vision right now.
I need a booty call who doesn't know my boyfriend or my friends.
you know you were refereeing rock paper scissors for who got to make out with your sister right?
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
Just saw some airport workers running through the terminal with liquor bottles. That's my kind of emergency.
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
All I want to do is shower, but there is a keg in there.
You're finding a boat, I'm going to sleep with a guy that lives above a bar and has 24 hour access. We are really nailing this adulting thing
I want to die, ON THAT, with that INSIDE ME. ironically, I sense that would be the only time I'd feel alive.
Did this whole conversation happen while you were shitting?
I can get something to clone your cock for $40. It's worth it. It's my birthday present to myself.
OMG I CAN GET A GLOW-IN-THE-DARK ONE
On another note, I kinda only wanna poop laying down now
I'm always down for nudity.
There were no words. I got in his car, took my pants off, threw my shirt out the window, and got things started. After we were done I collected my clothes, gave him a kiss, and crept back into my house.
You're like the sex ninja. How doesn't he love you?!
Randomize
