I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
I thought I had fell out of his trailer but he says I tried to ninja kick his TV stand saying those girls hula hooping were trying to seduce him. There wasn't anyone else there.
he said "you're pretty" then i made out with him. thats all it took
Highlight of my evening, pile of books falling onto me in front of people
sorry I didn't call you. I had your number saved as "girl that offered bj but didn't follow thru".
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
Yeah it was hard to find an opportunity while fucking him to say "oh the reason my lips taste so salty is because i blew your roomate 15 minutes ago"
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
In the middle of switching positions, we shared a line of coke. It's was like a modern-day 'Lady and the Tramp.'
there may or may not be knives in your bed. I would check
Already puke and ralleyd and dressed like a bear.
Stumbled into class and into a desk. When I fell my bottle broke in my backpack. I had to leave there was vodka everywhere.
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
Can I trade you chipotle for a pregnancy test?
You know you're old when you’re masturbating and you pull your hip
Randomize
