im drinking this country out of the recession.
No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
how the fuck am i supposed to make breakfast with spaghettios and mustard
The child next door sounds like he's having vigorous sex in the backyard and it's making me very, very uncomfortable. I don't want to look.
YOU CAN MICROWAVE POPTARTS!?!??!
does dane cook know its not 2004 and that hes no longer relevant?
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
He just called me juicy booty via text message.
Ur gonna wake up early as dick tomorrow to do some responsible shit but im the one up at 3 am right now cooking brats soaked in keystone light so fuck your falling asleep ass bitch
After 13 tally marks I wrote the number 4,000 and made u sign my arm to prove it.
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
Just watched a drunk girl hand her valet ticket to a cop and walk away.
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
dude. I can hear the air.
Randomize
