Small penises have feelings too.
if you were to get worldwide popularity from playing guitar with a plastic yellow bat while drunk on YouTube, would you hate me?
I definitely didn't wake up this morning thinking "i wanna get gang banged today"
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
She just looked down there and said "i breed horses. this is better than anything ive ever seen."
Also, you peed on your hand last night. Id just like to point that out
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
Matt's offering to breast feed it.
I wanna get high and watch Shrek tonight...don't make me do it alone.
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
I made a bong out of my deodorant today. Did you?
I just bought a blender and 120 pizza rolls. Bring tequila.
Foreign objects found in purse this morning include: chocolate covered pretzels, pepper spray, and farm animal shaped key chains (you know the ones you squeeze and fake poop comes out, yea those)
sometimes i like to lay one the floor and pretend im a carrot.
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
Randomize
