So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
I'm in the dining hall. that same guy is here again, the one who sits alone and talks to his silverware.
man, work is way more interesting with these acid flashbacks.
I went to the gas station and the lady goes I remember you. Broken sunglasses and puke on your car.
I feel like shaving is just admitting i'm gonna do him, even though im still on the fence
shave. it'll take 10 min. Better safe than hairy.
He insisted that I looked like Kiefer Sutherland, told me he didn't know what to do about it, then hugged me awkwardly.
Also, hurry up because I don't like drinking alone. I'm still doing it, but I don't like it.
I'm sitting next to some random guy in a gorilla suit drinking out of a bottle of vodka.
He's majoring in Religion
Exactly. So he deserves crazy "thanks for keeping me out of jail" sex. Or an "I'm glad your excessive cocaine habit had some positive outcomes" blowjob.
It must have been an amazing night, I have "my pants are responsible people" written on my pants in permanent marker.
I have effectively turned laundry day into a drinking game.
Hey, sorry for threatening to teabag your mom to death last night
I'm sorry that running around town like a frenetic wombat trying to find you KY jelly isn't good enough for you.
I just used an Amazon gift card from a student to order a new vibrator....teacher of the year
Drunk version of me is like a sleeping demon inside of me that awakes to the sound of vodka
Randomize
