I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
turns out making maccaroni and cheese with whipped cream instead of butter is only good when your high
I made a google map for "places I got blow jobs"
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
Yeah he gave the rest of the brownies to the bouncer that took his fake
I'm handcuffed to your bathroom sink. Save me.
Whoever put the picture of my dad in the condom box is an asshole
I was scared I had HIV after last time so I'm not gonna do it again
But he was really hot
Glad you don't have HIV
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
It's after midnight. I didn't find the answer to my problem, but I did find the bottom of a bottle of vodka, so... there's that.
We can't do acid Disneyworld.
A girl just invited me over for a blowjob and beer. Is this a trap?
I gave you chlamydia, you gave me a concussion. Now we're even.
I hate when I wake up and find my vibrator next to me. Such a waste of an orgasm...getting myself off in my sleep and not remembering
so i just realized the reason you didn't answer my call last night is because the remote isn't a phone.
Randomize
