I feel like our house is getting pulled over.
Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
he told me I talked like a deaf person
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
you want a dog just so you can strap a barrel of hot chocolate around its neck?
My dick hurts from so many people grabbing it last night. We're not going back to that club
I'm pretty sure I did the Macarena with a gay guy while shot gunning a beer
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
While randomly hooking up with my neighbor last night he says "it's okay we're neighbors".
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
I just realized my hands still smell like your cock. Which is awesome, but I wonder if the clerk at the store appreciated it.
I feel bad. I'm the reason hand sanitizer exists.
it'll be like a game of Russian Roulette, but with my vagina.
I love you. Doing a double. Going to die. It will be painful. Let the world know i partied. God, did i party.
Randomize
