Every now and then I'll talk to a creeper for an extended amount of time. Randy, for instance, funded our entire night of horrible decisions.
It was fun until I shot a pea out of my nose while throwing up. Left over tuna casarole at 3Am was a terrible choice.
I keep having to talk dad out of putting tequila in the milkshakes.
like stop trying to get a relationship out of this when i'm clearly in the drunken mistakes part of my life.
He gets a blow job; I get my oil changed free of charge. And that way I only see him every 2500 miles.
He just broke up w his most recent gf again, wish I could message her and be like it's not you he's gay.
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
you left me with this keg alone. this is on your hands
Im pretty sure that girl just said "Im taking you home even if your girlfriend has to come too." Why are we here again?
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
Oh I was gonna ask you the same thing...? It's official ask anyone to see your husbands dick day.
We should buy t shirt guns and blow eggs out of them at his house. Bachelorette party
DO NOT LET HIM TAKE CONTROL OVER YOUR BOWELS
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
it's your last night here, let's make it one we may or may not remember.
Randomize
