Jason Williams (yeah the ex-nets center...) drunkenly told me that, while drinking, I should take an ambien and a cialis before i go home...that will "give me a 25 minute window to have sex and then goto sleep before the bitch starts bothering me"....
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
Found her in the closet eating mayo out of the jar with a knife
Had to make a piece of abstract art. Your dick is in it
she bonged a coffee cause she was hungover. then she bonged a beer cause she got ambitious. then she barfed. then she had to start over again.
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
It was relaxing until your penis crawled in my ear.
I have vodka and a slip n slide so of you could come over that would be great
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
Let's drink tonight I promise I'll make it out of the house
Getting paid in weed to watch a pregnant adult with cooking skills is the TITS
look, im sorry that i yelled at your little brother, threw my car keys at him and smashed a stale cookie with a pool cue, but i swear to god i didn't poop on the floor. it was one of your dogs.
I just talked to him. no worries he had the same fears you did this morning and smelled the dryer to make sure. you officially did not pee in there haha
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
Well it was okay until he pinned my arms over my head and I found the loaded pistol tucked behind the bed... THIS IS WHY WE DON'T FUCK BOYS IN MONTANA ANYMORE
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