Getting food. Want anything?
Vagina. Double meat no buns. I have the secret sauce
I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
We need to get cat food
Nevermind, the cat will eat lucky charms
i spent 45 minuets spilling my heart out to him telling him i was in love with this other guy sorry. when i was done he asked me to give him a blow job. i did. i have commitment problems
She alternated between blowing me and feeding me bites of the sandwich she made for me.
He told me I handled myself pretty well considering how drunk I was. He failed to realize that the lollipop I had was one I found on the ground a few minutes before hand.
Grindr hookup awareness: always make sure that you agree to blow one person and they aren't bringing a Friend/boyfriend. Shits weird when you're sober.
Apparently when the cops arrived I was standing over him in the bathroom yelling, get the fuck up you piece of shit. Beer still in hand.
Literally sitting on my bed in the dark trying not to throw up
I feel better now, I have multiple fuck buddies again
You gotta own your makeout pics Matt. They're like badges of honor
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
The first thing he said was that my underwear smelled like Trix but then he looked up at me and whispered "Silly rabbit, vagina is for me."
The only thing I remember about us having sex is yelling at him to choke me.
I think the cashier at 7/11 might be planning an intervention for me.
Randomize