soo according to the calendar on my phone, I'm 5 minutes late to have sex with that guy from work. Apparently we planned this, I even set an alarm.
And i laid in the yard with carrots on my chest cause i wanted a bunny
I just shot gunned a beer for your birthday alone because you're too hungover at midnight to get out of bed. I'm not sure which of us is the bigger loser
Do you remember calling me and dedicating a shot to me?
I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.
The countdown is at hand. We are 15 days from so much Jameson that names will be forgotten. Prepare your liver now or severe projectile vomiting will be the theme of the night.
I think ur a lot drunker then u think u are. That girl has the body of a cartoon character and not in a good way.
I threw up on my way to work while listening to "the good times are killing me". this award goes to modest mouse for creating the most poetic puke ever
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
He sat down, pointed at my Converse and said "I have the same shoes." I thought "I'm going to have sex with you by the end of the night."
The highlight was when a stranger was nose to nose with you threatening to kick ur ass, and you said "Is that your real face? Stopped him dead.
And thank god for autocorrect cuz I can't even think in English let alone spell in it right now.
Someone drank my pedialite!
YOU drank your pedialite. I watched you chase shots with it!
how do i say "cradle the balls" in Italian
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
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