Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
Please just tell me how ugly she was so I can bask in the diminishingly small reassurance that might give me
i havent blinked in 235 seconds. now 247. now 258. 263. 267. 271. i also have been gifted with theability to both type and count and not blink. 293 so magical
Ok, it is technically a gay bar but it's a total dive w/ strong drinks. The important thing is you can start drinking at 11:00 am without judgement
oh oh oh, and apparently you can bring in your own snacks. Some old dude just gave me cashews and cheetos.
So how much of last night are we going to pretend never happened? Enough to stay friends?
Only sluts go out in this weather carpe diem boys
He picked up a chick with a line about the price of used cars in Sri Lanka and developing economies. Step it up.
It's funny to me the only time that you clean up is when your weed delivery man is on the way.
I need a costume for that party. Even if I'm just taking it off.
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
its 2pm and were already starting beer pong...its gonna be a good night
sorry about your sharpie. alex wanted to shave the left side of his body so he had me draw a line over him with a ruler
dad says come back and get the lawn mower out of the pool before mom gets home
the orange of my hangover Tang is hurting my eyes... my coworkers knew it was hangover Tang too.
Randomize
