i was so drunk he made me beileve the song was called "thanksgiving sex."
My bracket is officially just a list of teams that lost.
Dudes got a Polo tattoo. I don't care if he has a yacht I can't handle that level of gay.
Judging that there's a photo of me getting head while sitting on a graveyard tombstone.....not good.
trying to imitate man vs food after 12 shots doesnt mean youll get laid
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
You could make a naked club. One member, you. One president, you.
Wear whatever you want, I'm wearing ass-less chaps and a sombrero
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
Hooked up with an ex Playgirl model. I feel like the universe just high-fived me for staying sober.
my balls were so many shades of blue last night I could have used them as paint and replicated the entirety of Picaso's blue period. The girl was an art major I feel like this metaphor is appropriate.
I'm spending my Sunday wishing the entire Patriots offense would let me touch their manhood
Question: When you have the names of 4 guys tattoo'd on you, how do you make the 5th one real special?
Randomize
