Kareoke will never be a sober sport
Ugh I just know that when I take off his pants his underwear will have Megan's Law written all over them.
Update: no underwear. Greeeeen light.
we screwed to my bar mtzvah tape, I became a man while watching myself becom a man
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just found out that AAA will pick you up if you're drunk for free if you're a member. How did I not know about this?
I just want you to know I tipped the cab driver $10 last night because I felt bad that he didn't have healthcare.
The story about him having a girlfriend changed real fast when he found out that I was a gymnast
I found him in the livingroom trying to soak up broken glass with the clock from the kitchen.
I heard moaning and ass slapping and sponge bob.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I peppersprayed myself last night. Sigh.
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
I'm two shots in and wandering around Barnes and Noble with $58 in singles.
Don't drink and shop. I went for happy hour and came home with a fog machine. I now have no other choice but to scare the shit out of my neighbors with it.
Im so sorry for peeing on your chest.
woke up with 4 bruises, 2 hickies and a bad case of rug burn. texans are dangerous.
Randomize