we were frolicking through a fountain of pizza rolls. it was like the best dream i ever had
I am pretty sure I told him the clouds were earth's purest filtration system and that snow was the rarest and most delicious water in the world. My lips are burning because we ate so much.
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
...But it's not like we would be the first people to pay for an abortion with student loans and cell phone rebates.
Is YOLO really just a socially acceptable way to say you enjoy putting things up your nose?
no, she just came home, mumbled about being a gerbil out of water then ate half cooked chicken nuggets.. normal night
your sister totally cock blocked me last night don't even think about inviting her to taco night
No work today. I woke up and someone had written "Markhot Penis = Party" on my forehead in sharpie. Do you know a Mark?
Let's drink tonight I promise I'll make it out of the house
Let the clothes fall where they may.
She grinded so hard on my face that I've got rugburn on both eyelids
Stopping for a booty call on the way to a lunch date... Bad form?
It's his. I know, I'm pregnant with a genetic douche bag but at least he'll be pretty!
Mandatory face masks - finally, a solution for lip augmentation failures and bad breath.
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