Is it bad that when I see ugly people make out, I hope he's impotent?
woke up and her hair clip was clamped around my shaft
i just unintentionally masturbated to my own facebook picture
bought some hannah montana deodorant. hope it doesnt make me smell untalented
First order of business is dropping my 9 am gym class. I'm sweating pure vodka.
he got his own cum in his own eye. TWICE. how do you make that mistake again?
unrelatedly i think im gonna download boogie nights just to see mark wahlberg's penis
His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
She said she wanted to have closure sex.
He walked into the bar right as I was licking the shotglass clean. We made eye contact for way too long..
the number of desperate girls at the gym right now is unfair. it would be cruel not to let one blow me.
Every time I try to do something productive I end up searching ghost porn.
it's a shower with the lights off kind of day
Is it ok that I asked him half way through sex why he hadn't accepted my friend request yet?
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