My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
and she said "My body is an orphanage, I take everybody in"...
she wrote "SORRY" in her vomit and left
remember to ask your mom about the name of her pet duck so we can name the bowl
I just sent a friend request to someone saying that i was the girl he shared a fifth of jager with last week. Thats something special. He better accept.
Sounds good! I plan on writing a book entitled: I've Probably Done Cocaine In Your Bathroom. A tell-all by Lauren.
I know how to make vodka btw in case you want to come over and do a science project
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
He stopped in the middle of us banging in order to check in for his Southwest flight.
I need two food groups: booze and turkey sandwiches
Like not to be gross, he was eating me out while I was smoking a bowl. It was like a rap video
The comfort of this onesie is keeping me single
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
Omg I should get on tinder just to get some edibles in town
he told me he wanted me to go see his cat. apparently i was more interested in playing with his cat then having sex.
Randomize
