Tell Heather sorry for burning her hair. Also for anything else that I may have done that warrants and apology. Anything after about 10pm is kind of hazy.
he's making romantic advances towards me. and he has a pet snake. 2nd part not relevant, but interesting.
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
i gave her a can of corn and told her the cabs are accepting non perishable food items over the holidays. blatant lie and she lives like $40 away
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
STOP CALLING ME LADY CHLAMYDIA
Do you think you can get drunk by standing in a tank of vodka if it is seeping into your skin?
Apparently there was a point in the night that they literally thought he was dead, ass naked on the floor. That bad.
she made a facebook for her toddler.. his likes include lil wayne and ice luge. He has more friends than i do. I mean, Seriously? there's not enough booze in the world to make thanksgiveing bearable
You beat him at the shot competition, and proceeded to rub it in while telling everyone to "ASK ME A MATH QUESTION!!!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm gonna do some tripping... In the direction of balls
The only thing I regret was that he was wearing a scarf when we made out.
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
We fucked on a kid's slide, my vagina is singing praises of being used
Well, that's not my fault. I make decisions all the time when I'm drunk.
ETA 20 minutes and if you greet me at the door with a gin & tonic I’ll give you head.
Randomize