Dude i fell asleep inside of her
thats awesome
we were having sex in the shower and he dropped me. try explaining THAT to your concerned little brother
tell your sister to shave her snatch
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
stumble upon led me to how to make wine in prison, followed by wedding dresses. it knows my life too well
Our local strip club now has karaoke. Do you realize what this could mean for my sex life?
It feels like im being cuddled by a thousand little smurf vaginas
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
And before you knew it they were calling me the pussy usher or something like that
Mostly i might never get belligerent again because im gonna have to keep track of a diamond ring.
I mean, "boo" isn't the appropriate response to someone dying...
She gave you a handy in the bar and you were surprised she was good with a dick?
Hahah good point
I woke up with a thorn in my belly button. A THORN!
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
I almost wanna stick a tampon in and sneeze bent over to see if it actually shoots out
Randomize
