Wasted at the beach. Toasting underage, overdeveloped girls. God bless 'em.
was it mean of me to chase him screaming "DO YOU EVER WANT TO BE ABLE TO HAVE CHILDREN?!"?
all i remember thinking as i was puking my intestines out is : wow.. this toilet does look like it's from the future.
OH MY GOD. JESUS STRIPPER. THERE IS A JESUS STRIPPER HERE. A STRIPPER DRESSED AS JESUS.
Last thing I remember was you straddling a guy in a wheelchair on the dance floor.
Dude that bathroom stall was not tall enough to be doing lines in, guys kept peeking over and giving us high fives
Those people having sex on the beach kept looking over at you guys throwing his shoes at the seagulls.
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
he forgot we were at my place and not his so he tried kicking me out of my own apartment by saying "so, you can go whenever you want...."
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
But... naked.
Your resume just got faxed, I also modified it a bit and sent it to strip clubs...expect weird phone calls...
So baked. About to eat a calzone then hate fuck this guy.
THAT'S MY GIRL
I just want to be like "i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it"
Not to make this awkward, but if we ever have sex (perhaps drunkenly), all i'm gonna be able to think about is how sexy our kids would be.
I trusted a fart in Toronto. NEVER TRUST A FART IN TORONTO.
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