Betty ford says i'm here all night
A little girl and i are having a face making battle in mcdonalds
She started it, but I totally finished it.
I am NOT getting arrested in a batman mask
I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
I woke up naked this morning there was a baseball bat on the floor the bathroom door knob was removed and the floor was wet. This is why i don't do Tequila shots.
Just threw up on my desk at work. They are making me go home.
Either I'm a lot drunker than I thought, or he has three dicks....
I think I'm gonna have to go with the first one...
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
They said an hour before I even see a doctor...and they noticed the shots tally on my arm.
They told you that you couldn't fit in the dryer. Man, did they eat their words. You did brake the door though.
He gave me one look and told me I'm not allowed to board the plane if I'm still as drunk by departure time.
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
Laying on my driveway in my pajamas in the sun having my severe hangover cigarette, and the daycare house across the street is having playtime in the yard! I believe I'm currently being what's known as a "bad example!"
Only you would make Mario Party a contact sport.
And you owe me a new pair of switch controllers.
For the love of all that is holy just take the tranquilizers Erica
Randomize
