Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
I cant believe you went over there and fucked her last night after everything you said
she invited me over to play the wii, it's not like i intended to
You KNEW her power was out...
Redeem this text for a blowjob
she added emergen-c to the bong-water bro, brilliant.
Dont forget about the tuna sandwich behind your TV
Their was just 7 people standing outside eating a costco chicken, definitley at the right party
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
So puking trix and chicken wings is horrible but atleast we got free drinks for taking the trash out at the bar we are really movin up in the world
I found a playlist on my ipod with only one song on it: gold digger. confused, but not surprised.
Let's never forget the time I met you while you were running down the street naked and in handcuffs.
Operation: 12 Dick pics of Christmas was a sweeping success, thanks for asking!
Do u ever find yourself high af, watching American ninja warrior and crying at the athletes stories?
And for today's main disappontment. I thought I saw a midget with fireworks get on the buss, alas it's a child with cleaning supplies
I am so dumb. I made a mistake and let him get away.
Don't worry, there are other penises in the sea.
Thanks, mom.
I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU STUCK YOUR DICK IN CRAZY!
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